I feel like a bad mom, what should I do?

What should I do when I feel like a bad mom? This is the question that most moms asked to themselves when they feel like a failed mom or having bad days in their parenthood life. Parenting is not as easy as it seems. Especially when you are a new parent or parenting your first child. Here are 5 things to remember when you feel like a bad mom on this same blog so you can also read that too.

You will face many difficulties in this journey. It doesn’t mean that you are a terrible mom. In reality, it is guilt or your inner feelings that you are not doing enough for your baby. Sometimes it is known as mommy’s guilt. Women always ask themselves, am I a bad mom? So they start feeling like a bad mom in parenting.

• Try to relax and think it is just your bad day.

Everyone faces bad days in their lives. Sometimes, there are bad weeks and months instead of days. You can’t make everything perfect as per your wishes. Having challenging and terrible days does not define you as a bad mom. 

So stop asking yourself, am I a bad mom? And relax for a while because you don’t have to feel like a bad mom. It is not good to ask yourself questions like this. Your guilt also shows that you care about your child and are still trying to do everything perfectly.

• Stop comparing yourself to other moms.

The root cause of depression is when you start comparing yourself with other mothers. It will give you a dangerous break out of depression and anxiety. While having these thoughts, remember that in this whole world, no one is perfect, and not all the moms out there are excellent in their lives. 

You don’t know them personally, so you don’t know what circumstances they are going through. Everyone is learning day by day with new experiments and mistakes. They may also feel like a bad mom on their bad days, so stop comparing. Just give strength to yourself and start focusing on your side and improve yourself.

• Start giving time to yourself.

Most of the time, it happens that you do not have time. You can’t focus on yourself; your life changed significantly after having a baby. You can’t go out as frequently as before the baby, and you can’t hang out with your friends even if you don’t have time to take care of yourself.

So it’s better to have small breaks to energize and feel fresh. You would not feel like a bad mom anymore after having your own time for yourself. You may hire a babysitter, so you can go out on weekends with your friends and family, go to the cinema or watch some good movies, have dinner with your old friends, and pamper yourself. Having a baby is not like a burden on yourself. All you have to do is manage things smartly.

• Reflect on yourself and start improving

Nobody in this world is born with perfectionism. All you have to do is keep learning daily and improve yourself. Whenever you feel low and think you are not a good mom, start noticing where you are lacking and accepting your flaws and mistakes, and then try to fix them one by one.

Put yourself on an improvement journey and start learning parenting stuff with positivity and productivity with new techniques. Enjoy every step of learning and improving for your child. It will give you motivation. It will satisfy you and enjoy the little things of your baby.

• Try to be honest with yourself.

Negative thoughts always haunt you that you’re not a good mom. Look at your children. How are they acting? What kind of behavior do they have? Stop thinking like you are the leader of your thoughts; throw out all the negative reviews. Ask yourself frequently about your actions but don’t say, “I am a bad mom” just think about your actions, whether they are good or bad. 

And tell yourself that you are doing very well, remember those little tasks you did very well, and praise yourself. Pray to god if you are feeling low, ask him for the strength and wisdom you need, and trust him. He will help you and guide you to become a better mom. 

• Set your boundaries with your adult or grown kids when you feel like a bad mom.

If you feel your kid is not listening and responding to you when you ask them to behave, it’s better to set limits early and train them accordingly. They should know what is allowed to do and what is not. Your children have to know what kind of things they can expect.

When you set boundaries, stick to them and don’t show flexibility. If children are not following your instruction, they should have to know the consequences, and they should know that when you say something, you mean it.

• Accept your mistakes and apologize.

We all make mistakes, but it doesn’t mean you have the excuse not to say sorry; you must know that when you are wrong and misbehaving, you always apologize first. Especially when you become a parent, you must be a role model for your kid. Sometimes when you lose control and become angry, you will probably put your anger on your kid and yell at them. 

It doesn’t matter that they are wrong or right. But losing control and yelling at your kid is not suitable for your kids’ behavior. Your kid will also act the same way back as you did. Take responsibility for your actions and apologize to them. It’s like winning a heart.

• Don’t interfere and pamper too much.

Too much interference from parents in children’s lives is similar to the consequences of too much neglect. It will spoil your child. When you fulfill every demand and desire of your child and let them do things on their own, it lacks self-confidence and lack of problem-solving power. Which is the ultimate reason behind asking yourself, “ I am a bad mom” with grown kids. 

Let your child learn how to solve his little problem, don’t always be overprotective, and tell your child no matter if you fail or pass unless he tries his best. It will help boost your child’s self-esteem and self-confidence that they can do their things. Give them opportunities and trust them.

In a nutshell

Remember that you are not the only mom in this world. Every woman is going through the same situation. But the main focus is that you must keep learning from your mistakes and improving them daily. You may sometimes feel low and down. It’s okay to feel like this. You have to keep moving on your journey to get better and improve yourself to be the best in parenting your child.